Jun 19, 2019

Cultivate Your Life Podcast Episode 020: How To Say No

Share [Sassy_Social_Share]

Okay, moment of truth: Have you had a difficult time saying no lately?

Saying no is hard, so you always say yes:
Yes, I’d love to do that for you.
Yes, I’ll be there.
Yes, I’ll get it done.
Yes, yes, and one more yes.

And now you’re feeling stretched thin—like you have no control over that three-letter word that keeps slipping out of your mouth! I have been there a billion times over!

In this NEW episode of the podcast, my friend Emily P. Freeman joins me to chat all things decisions and saying yes to the right things. You’ll learn the 3 key questions to ask yourself when faced with any decision, big or small, that will help you say YES to what matters and no to all the rest—with confidence!


In this episode:

— I begin by telling you about some of my own “nos,” including to travel when my kids were younger. That one “no” made so many other decisions easy, and led to many great yeses!
— I introduce you to my friend Emily P. Freeman! She’s an author, a podcast host, and a “curious listener.” She helps women discern their next right thing in love, and she was the perfect guest to chat with about saying yes and saying no. 
— I give you three key questions to ask yourself when you’re faced with a decision. One of my favorites: “Are you being pushed by fear or led by love?” (That’s some goodness from Emily’s book!)
— Then, we chat about two very practical things to do that will help you say no, including a fool-proof phrase when you’re put on the spot!
— By the end of the episode, you’ll know how to decide if a yes or a no is the best next step, you’ll feel confident in your answers, and you’ll believe that every no can lead to a better yes!

Interested in some of the things I mentioned throughout this episode? Here you go!

— You can find Emily on her website, listen to her podcast, or read her new book, The Next Right Thing!
— I share the many ways of saying “no” from my friend Jessica N. Turners’ book, The Fringe Hours.
— Other books I love about soulful decision making: The Best Yes, Essentialism, and What’s Best Next.
— Based around the idea that we can’t do it all and do it all well but we CAN do what matters, my book, Cultivate, will help you sift through the many options in front of you as you hone in on your big picture vision.
— The PowerSheets Intentional Goal Planner is designed to help you make your best decisions and then live them out, little by little. PowerSheets are 30% off right now and going fast! Once they’re gone, they’re gone. 2020 PowerSheets release in October!

LOVE THE PODCAST? SHARE IT! Text, email, carrier pigeon—share this episode with friends however you like! This episode is really special, so I hope you’ll share it with someone you love! Feel free to grab one of these graphics to post about it, too!

WANT AN EMAIL WHEN A NEW EPISODE GOES LIVE? Enter your email address below, and I’ll send you a note when a new episode is up!

I’D LOVE TO MEET YOU! Come say hi on Instagram! I love sharing my life with you! And if you loved the outro, don’t miss the “Ari Raps” highlight on my Instagram!

SUBSCRIBE NOW to the Cultivate Your Life podcast on iTunes so you won’t miss an episode. If you love the podcast, please leave a quick review on iTunes—it helps other women find this free encouragement! Just click here to review, select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review” and let me know what your favorite part of the podcast is. I’ll be featuring some of your reviews in a future episode!


  1. Lindsay Tankersley on June 19, 2019 at 10:20 am

    This is something I’ve actually been doing recently. I like the “choose my absence”. I normally have something every night of the week. Ladies Bible study on Mondays, a fertility support group on Tuesdays (that I lead) and a couples small group on Wednesdays. Thurs is one of the only nights w/ my husband and we’re both so exhausted, then the weekends are always busy with something. Our bible study and small groups usually break for the summer, but the ladies of my bible study wanted to keep meeting. I straight up told them, “I need a break. Not from you all, but just from stuff” I was counting on that break and didn’t want to disappoint them that I wasn’t going to keep meeting with them over the summer, but they were OK. They still include me in on plans. But now I’ve found time to workout and not feel restricted on time. I can go to a Christian workout class on Mondays that’s not super close to where I live. I can go for a run w/o rushing through it and trying to freshen up before leaving the house again. I can have a dinner that’s not frozen or from a crock pot. This season of a break will end in a few months, but I feel like it’s helping me to take care of myself and my needs so that I can be the best version of me in these meetings and gatherings and not feel like I’m short changing myself. I’m only beginning listening to this podcast episode, but couldn’t wait to comment!

    • Lara on June 19, 2019 at 2:24 pm

      I’m so glad this episode is encouraging you!

  2. Priscilla Baxter on October 30, 2019 at 2:21 pm

    Wonderful..love the comment. lead by love or pushed by fear.

    • Lara on November 4, 2019 at 6:39 pm

      Hi, Priscila! Yes! Something great to ponder!

Leave a Comment