Jul 25, 2017
How to Embrace Change + Join Me and Korie Robertson
Goal Setting, Homeschool, Motherhood
This season ahead is full of change for our family. I’m taking a big leap and starting homeschool with Grace. This means a lot of things are changing, namely my work schedule and what will be filling my brain and heart each day. The journey ahead isn’t just about teaching her to read and write and discover the world (I’m going to have to rely on Ari to teach math!); it’s about cultivating her heart. More on homeschool in another post as we figure out what’s best for our family.
Today, I want to talk about change.
Change–even good change–can be uncomfortable.
Change is hard.
Transitions are hard.
But, after the last two years of rapid life change, here’s something I never thought I would say about this season ahead:
I am grateful to be stretched outside of my comfort zone.
We humans like certainty and known outcomes, am I right planner friends? Our brains seek out patterns and habits because they require less brain activity, so change literally feels uncomfortable. It feels like a lot of work because it is more work for our brains—and hearts.
That means that true change is supposed to feel hard. It may even mean we are growing in the right direction and changing for the better.
You might be thinking right now that you do not want change, even if it’s for the better. But, let’s dig a little deeper.
Do you want to live more intentionally?
If so, then yes, you do want change! You just may not want the hard parts that come along with it.
We want it but we don’t want it, right? : )
Do you have a transition or something new ahead?
Whether you’re starting something new, taking a leap of faith, walking through a season of waiting, helping kids transition back to school, or are in the thick of something challenging that’s pushing you outside of your comfort zone, here are three tips for embracing change. Disclaimer: these tips don’t apply to every situation, but I almost hesitate to even give that disclaimer! Y’all are wise beyond your years. Apply these tips with prayer and wisdom! They have certainly helped me in many situations over the last two years:
1) Go with it to grow with it. Resisting change might be making you spin your wheels, holding you back from potentially better outcomes. We try so hard to resist change, but that’s like resisting the seasons and wearing shorts in the winter! Winter clothes in the winter months are a good thing. You should wear them. : ) The alternative is to stay in your comfort zone and not actually be that comfortable in the end. Growth and change are inevitable parts of every new season.
2) Think big picture to break out of small thinking. Ask yourself, “Will this change get me closer to where I want to be when I’m 80 years old?” For me, will homeschooling Grace be crazy hard in the short term? Yes, likely. Will it bring me to my knees? Yes, I anticipate so. But, in the big picture, will it help Ari and me cultivate Grace’s unique heart? Lord willing, yes. Will taking a leap of faith and hiring a new team member help us grow and flourish–and therefore change more lives? Yes. Will embracing the changes my body is going through help me to uncover solutions? Most definitely. Denial is a comfortable place to be until it’s not. 🙂 In the big picture, could that leap of faith, move, big step, hard thing, or transition be good in the end? Sometimes we won’t know the answers until we embrace where we are and dig in to find out.
3) Consider something crazy: change might be good! The times I’m stretched to change are times I end up feeling most at peace. Why? Because I rely on God more instead of myself. When everything feels out of my control and I just can’t fix it all or figure it out or handle the change, I remember that I don’t have to. As I wrote in Cultivate, “You likely have heard the popular phrase: ‘She believed she could, so she did.’ Those words are lovely and instill confidence, but that doesn’t last. I know a deeper truth: She believed she couldn’t, so He did. You don’t have to make it all happen. You just have to take one step forward in faith and let Him do the rest. Where you can’t, God already has.” Surrendering in times of change helps me to find a peace that passes all understanding–a joy that supersedes all the hard stuff.
Change is hard, but change is essential for growth. In order to grow, a seed first has to let go of its outer shell.
Your turn! What change are you facing right now? Has it been hard? Are you feeling some fear? Do you have a tip for embracing change that has helped you? I’d love to hear from you!
I interviewed Korie Robertson, mom to six and author of Strong and Kind, about embracing change and cultivating strong families. Get the live replay for free here!
I needed to read this! We are transitioning our sons from an amazing private school that we LOVED but had become more expensive than our budget would allow. Everything in me wants to keep sending them there and just “figure it out”, but I know that being a good steward of our finances honors God and sets up our family for long term success. So, I’m laying this new school and season of change at God’s feet and saying to myself.. I know that you love these children more than I do…so I’m trusting that this is where you want them planted and that this the environment is exactly where they need to be so they can grow and thrive.
This was so nice to read! My husband and I are separating–it’s mutual, no hard feelings–so we can work on ourselves but also attend marriage counseling to work on how we work together. We still love each other so we’re trying to be proactive and take a breather to grow as people. It’s difficult of course , but we’re taking the time to date like we never really could when we first got totbetger because we were broke in college or working two jobs and had no time. I’m trying to embrace this change and come through the end a better person. Your words today have given me so much encouragement to embrace the uncomfortable.
Check out Revive Our Hearts online!! There is a 30 day Husband Encouragement challenge that changed me and ultimately my husband. We are stronger than ever! Whatever you do, do not divorce. Worn through this life together. God gave each of you to one another as gifts! Treasure one another. Marriage requires unconditional love so that we may reflect our relationship with Christ. Stay strong!
Love this, Lara! Thank you! 🙂 What an exciting new adventure for you and your family! I am definitely in the midst of change AND waiting. The relationship I was in that I was *sure* was leading to marriage, unexpectedly unraveled a few months ago, so the last few months have been ALL about change and surrender and waiting for God to show me what’s next. I’ve been loving Joseph’s story during this season of change and transition. I love that His story shows the importance of staying connected to God in all seasons — but especially challenging ones. Joseph has reminded me that the best preparation for what God has planned for us is simply knowing Him more. If we seek first His Kingdom, His way, His will…He will prepare us for whatever season is ahead (and strengthen us in our times of waiting and change). That brings me such hope for now and for the future! I also love your thoughts on not resisting change. It can be so hard to let go of what we hoped for or expected was going to happen, but I’m learning to cling less and less to my way, my hopes, my expectations, and surrender all of those to Him. It’s hard work, but worth it! 🙂 And I am believing that what He has planned is so much better than anything I could dream up anyway! 🙂
Love what you shared Katie. You are so right – time and time again, God has been faithful as I struggle through different seasons. He has never disappointed and I remind myself of this in the midst of any challenging season. He will lead you to your intended. Keep the faith. BTW, I used to think that I was destined to be single but I’m now happily married for 16 years! Couldn’t imagine it back then! ????
Thank you so much, Lorraine! 🙂 What an encouragement to read your sweet message! It’s been a long, long season of singleness, and I so appreciate your encouragement to keep the faith. I struggle with doubt many days, but just keep trying to trust in HIS good plan and purpose. Congrats on being married for 16 years! That’s so wonderful!! 🙂
This was perfect timing for me, Lara! In the next month I’ll be starting a new teaching position, *God-willing* closing on a home walking distance to Natalie’s school and our church, and growing my family as my boyfriend moves in with us. It’s remarkable, and I’ve had a very long journey, but God has provided each next step as I’ve leaned into the challenges and out of my comfort zone.
Yes! I feel as though I’ve been in a season of change for the last 2 years and to be honest I have not responded well. However, I’m thankful that the Lord is allowing me to recognize how poor my attitude has been about it. So now, I’m being more intentional about being a part of the change as opposed to resisting it. So back to school stuff, career stuff, relationship stuff are all in the midst of “change”, but God is good and full of grace. So let’s go!
Change in a new town, home, and business has all been hard and scary. We’re coming up on a year and it’s still crazy hard! But little by little, we are finding a new rhythm and trying to take root where we’ve been replanted. 🙂 Praying/remembering to count our blessings and leaning on our families for support is what is helping us get through it!
This question is amazing: “Will this change get me closer to where I want to be when I’m 80 years old?” Reading that helped me feel clearer about scary changes that are taking place in my own life, too. Thank you!
Thank you for sharing this today, Lara. It was very timely for me as I transition to a new position at work and it’s a big shift! I know I can do it, but I also know that #Godalreadyhas. 🙂
Welcome to homeschooling! It is such a gift for our family.
I love that you put “do something crazy!” My husband and I are in the middle of possibly moving out of state REALLY soon and it’s so nerve-wracking but also sooooo exciting!! Thank you for this wonderful post!! I wish you best with homeschooling:)
I love being a witness to how the PowerSheets (and God!) have helped you prepare for this big change for your family and sweet Grace!
There’s lots of change going on in our family too. We got a puppy and are in the midst of moving houses too. I just about had a breakdown last week but was quickly reminded of my many blessings. No stress now! It’ll all get done when it’s supposed to. 🙂
Yay! I’m so excited for your new homeschool journey! It will grow you and stretch you in ways you can’t imagine. If homeschool brings you to your knees, then you’re definitely doing it well 🙂
Congratulations on the business growth and new team members. You’ve got a great group of ladies there.
I have always embraced change and thought “change is good” but currently there is TOO MUCH change in my life and I am struggling with God’s grace. I just went through a divorce and now a single mother to 3 kids 4 and under.. My parents moved in with me to help but that is a disaster with their judgment. I am changing jobs after 15years for a better work-life balance and super scared. I love my current job except the hours are not family friendly and as you said, it is a known, safe entity. Is too much change good?
I’m currently in the middle of a season where everything is up in the air! I want to move back down south from NYC, and focus on a career who’s brand I believe in that also allows me to focus on my writing, family, and intentionality. Prayerfully searching for that, and trying not to worry myself with all of the “What-Ifs?” I know that God is making a way. 🙂
I have a new job starting Aug. 1st in an area I have never worked in before. I feel God has opened this door. A lot of it is out of my comfort zone, but I want to be building the Kingdom and serving my community.
Good evrning! Will you be restocking the journals? Thank you, Diana
Oh Lara! Thank you for this. I am going through so much change, I feel like I am going crazy. I am closing my non-profit, most likely moving, getting married again, and transitioning to working online and opening another business. It is so much I feel like I am breaking. I needed these words so much today. Thank you, my friend, for your wisdom, vulnerablitiy, and clarity!
I really needed to hear this! Thank you, Lara. <3
Such a beautiful post Lara! thank you so much for sharing your story! It is wonderful – and so inspiring – to hear how you are going through this new season and the mindset you have about it. I truly admire that.
I am sending you lots of love and light.
I’m about to enter into full time work after being part time for a few months now. I have a boss who is taking a chance on me and believing that I can do what I think I can’t. She is thinking ahead and giving me that opportunity to gain skills that would be useful for the future. Tip #1 definitely spoke to me!
This was great. I am transitioning into marriage in 6 weeks, and I have to say, I am starting to freak out over the change! But I know in order to grow and move forward into a better season, I need to embrace this change. I’m in my 30s, and it’s time for me to start a family. I know that means giving up some of my freedom, but it means a better, more fulfilling life.