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Chapter 3: End the Extremes

By Lara |

welcome!

“You know all those things you’ve always wanted to do? You should go DO them!” – Lara

Hi, I’m Lara! I grow flowers and meaningful things. I built two beautiful businesses (acquired in 2022) and I’m in a whole new season of life. I love healthy living, good words, the Word, hiking, and Charlotte Mason homeschooling. I’m the creator of the PowerSheets and Write the Word journals, founder of Cultivate What Matters, Southern Weddings magazine, and best-selling author of Make It Happen, Cultivate, and Gracie’s Garden. Chapel Hill, NC. I’m glad you’re here!

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How do you LET GO OF A DREAM? How do you do it wh

How do you LET GO OF A DREAM?

How do you do it when it’s so much a part of your identity? How do you know what to do next? How do you know WHEN IT’S TIME? How do you disappoint people? How do you know if this is the right decision at all? Where do you begin?! It’s all overwhelming and you have more questions than answers at this point.

Hi, I’m Lara. I built five beautiful brands: a luxury wedding production firm, a conference that enjoyed 55+ events, a branding agency, @southernweddings Magazine, and Cultivate What Matters (acquired in 2022). I’ve coached thousands of women over the years to grow good things, prune to flourish, and step into new seasons.

I’m in a whole new season of life myself these days. I love healthy living, making a mess in my garden with my three children, and helping women flourish at work—and in life.

Friend, I know what it’s like to be restless, knowing something needs to change. And I won’t tell you it will be easy. But, if you’re walking in God‘s direction, it will be worth it, no matter what other people think.

Maybe it’s a an entire business, or a job, or the way you’ve been living. Maybe it’s a ladder you’ve been climbing or a dream that needs to go to make room for something better.

You want to make room, but you don’t know where to begin unraveling everything. It’s overwhelming - terrifying at moments - and you want guidance from someone who’s been there.

I’ve had a wonderful career (full of ups and downs, of course!), and God has led me to a new season of life with my family, and serving others in their life’s work.

I’m grateful to serve you, Lord willing, with 6 questions that will give you clarity on your next steps.

Surprise, I wrote a little book for you yesterday! 📗🙌

Whether you’re discerning a new season in business, a big move, a new career path, doing something you’ve always wanted to do, or closing a chapter in a long-time dream, this is for you. I hope these 6 questions that I’ve used for many years bring you clarity and connection to what matters in your season.

Comment or DM me with the word DREAM and I’ll send you a copy. 📚

P.S. Don’t miss the dedication page!

You’re a FOUNDER / CEO and you’re tired. When

You’re a FOUNDER / CEO and you’re tired.

When did business get so complex?!
You want to help people and make a good profit, but you never envisioned this stress.

And, right now, you just have to keep moving.

I talk to female founders EVERY DAY who reach out to me and share this heartache. I understand because I was there. My business grew beyond me at several points and I didn’t think there was a way forward except to keep pushing through.

The truth is (and nobody wants to face this, but it’s freeing when you do):

Your business WILL either change hands or close at some point.

The question is, are you going to
let it die
die with it
or let it grow into something that lasts longer than you.

The first and third options can both be good. The latter holds a lot of possibility. There are many ways to do that well for the good of your health, your family, and what you’ve built. Whether you have $10 in revenue or 10 million, you’ve built something of value—and your life and health and your people are far more valuable than any of it.

What do you need to do next?

Maybe you need to prune, maybe you need guidance, maybe you need to sell but have no idea what that looks like, maybe you think you need to hire another CEO so you can get back to doing your thing, maybe you need to focus on what’s most impactful and let go of the rest, or maybe you need a break—a retreat to let your mind see clearly again. Maybe (likely) you need rest but it feels impossible to take right now.

3 things I hope will help you:

1. You want a significant break, but sabbatical is out of reach. Small still matters. One deep breath can change everything. Walk. Move. Nourish. Step into a different space. Give your nervous system a chance to regulate and see how it changes your decisions. It will.

2. Surround yourself with voices that help you get to where you really want to go. Do you REALLY want the “success” you have in your mind sometimes? Maybe it’s time to turn down that noise.

3. If you ever need encouragement, send me a DM. I’d love to encourage you where I can. 💛

This advice changed everything for me. 📣🙌 H

This advice changed everything for me. 📣🙌

Have you ever felt the pressure to make a project, launch, business, or venture “GREAT?” You feel the pressure that it has to be the best or it will fail, and people will judge you! You tell yourself that doing it halfway would be failure.

When I was writing my first book 12 years ago, I was feeling that pressure.

A peek into my head then:
- What will people think?? Will they like it??
- Am I writing words that I want to be out in the world forever and ever? It felt very permanent.
- There will be reviews and that terrifies me - people will critique me.
- I’ve never written a book before - a blog, yes, but not 70,000 words. I don’t know the first thing about book writing. [Googles “How to write a book” … ]
- What if I FAIL?? Maybe I should quit right now. I almost did.

Enter my father-in-law’s advice that changed my thinking and has stayed with me since—through three books, twelve years of life, two beautiful companies, dozens of product launches, big moves, 55+ conferences hosted, selling a company I loved to follow God’s lead, and many pressure-filled seasons:

“Don’t make this the most important thing you’ve ever done.”

Woosh.

Better than anything you can give me in a box is the gift of perspective.

I’ve kept that wisdom brewing in my mind for a dozen years—the dozen that have been the most refining and fruitful for my faith and family.

Are you feeling the pressure with something right now? I hope this advice gives you the gift of perspective, too.

And it begs the question, “What IS the most important thing you’ll ever do?”

What will it be for you?

Video: I took her shopping to get a new dress, and she wanted to see it twirl. Wish granted. 🥰

She was SO surprised. Things I never thought I wo

She was SO surprised.

Things I never thought I would do:

Renew my personal training certification after 20+ years with the National Academy of Sports Medicine. @nasm_fitness

Me: “I don’t want to train people; I want to learn. I’m doing this for the joy of it.” I don’t think she’d ever had someone say that.

(I have 90 days to study and take my exam July 1st - it has already been so fun to dig into.)

Training people 1-1, when I worked at Crunch on 59th and 2nd in New York City many years ago, was the springboard for all did in my career.

I learned about where real motivation comes from to ignite change, the power of by little-by-little steps that add up over time, and how to equip people to live out what matters - in work and life.

I’m grateful to continue to learn! God is already leading me to serve others in new ways. It starts with me following Him—and taking steps of faith.

One thing I’ve learned since hanging up my CEO hat?

Not all the good things you do have to turn into a business, but they do turn into a life.

Like a great book, transformative hospitality brin

Like a great book, transformative hospitality brings people into a story – and helps them see their own in a new way.

My mom showed me this firsthand as she gathered people around a table to use her skills as a French chef. Whether it was dignitaries or my friends from middle school growing up, she loved people through food and transformative hospitality. She has been a food writer for almost two decades now, and she continues to remind me of the power of doing small things with great love. If you’ve eaten in her kitchen, you know!

This is the hallmark of a great company—and hotel, too.

Small things with great love change people. As I shared in my keynote at Harvard last week, this is redeeming work. It matters. It creates a ripple effect.

I loved my stay at the Charles hotel for three reasons:

1. They told a story and brought me into it. The history woven into the hotel and how they cared for guests made us feel like we were part of a bigger story — a family.

2. The health and wellness focus helped me live my own story well. Thoughtful amenities and farm-to-table food made me feel good and gave me energy to love others well, too.

3. The people. It’s always the people! Each person I interacted with was grateful to be there and they invited me in wherever I went. (I always love exploring a hotel and all its nooks and crannies!) This hints at great culture. Loved people love people.

You know I’ve always geeked out over customer delight. It’s in my blood, thanks to my mom. 💛

@charleshotel
@henriettastable
@corbuspasalon
@regattabarjazzclub
@hfharvard

The research is clear on what produces happiness a

The research is clear on what produces happiness and life satisfaction: above money or accolades, circumstances and status, it’s largely people.

Close personal relationships.

Community.
Connection.
Sharing life together.

The Bible takes the research and multiplies it: we love because God first loved us. 1 John 4:19

The way we listen.
The way we care.
The way we give our gifts to others and encourage their gifts, too.

It makes people wonder where our hope comes from.

God’s version of happiness — and flourishing — is richer and more lasting than what our culture presses toward. While everyone around you might be happily overspending, overindulging, trying to find wholeness where they’ll never find it, or rising to the top of the success ladder at any cost, there is a much greater life satisfaction for those who follow a different path.

We know that the goal of life is not happiness as an end to itself; the goal is Him.

‘Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord, whose trust is the Lord. He is like a tree planted by water, that sends out its roots by the stream, and does not fear when heat comes, for its leaves remain green, and is not anxious in the year of drought, for it does not cease to bear fruit.’ - Jeremiah 17:7-8 🌱

More in my stories @laracasey

Our Top 10 from our fitness and wellness marriage

Our Top 10 from our fitness and wellness marriage retreat at the @carillonhotel in Miami Beach. We loved it.

Not pictured (the video shows 9 things - ha!): the easy flight. It was a direct flight for us from RDU to Miami (just an hour and a half on @americanair), which made travel feel super smooth.

We booked our stay at @carillonhotel using their spring promotion, which gave us 25% off if we pre-paid and two spa treatments. If I were to do it again, I’d book through @americanexpress Platinum, which gives you an even lower rate, room upgrade, 4pm checkout, and a food and experience credit.

We spent time dreaming together about our future ministry, praying, working out, trying new things, and enjoying each other’s company in the sun. We’ve used the @gottmaninstitute Card Decks app (free) several times now for marriage summits - the open-ended questions have been so helpful for us to dream and connect.

Overall, 100% worth the trip and we would love to return—maybe next time with friends! 💛 Anyone want to join us?

What you DON’T see in these photos and videos fr

What you DON’T see in these photos and videos from our time here at the @carillonhotel are all the small everyday habits we’ve recently started in our marriage:

- The 6 marriage questions we ask each other every weekend
- Morning and evening prayer, without fail
- Saturday afternoon date walks
- The repentance and daily grace
- Hugging for at least 10 seconds multiple times a day – it changes your hormones and connection together
- Working through challenges each week with a Christian counselor who helps families with special needs - this has been life-changing
- The simple act of asking each other questions throughout the day - curiosity about what dreams and challenges each of us has
- Remembering God’s faithfulness to bring us through very hard conversations and seasons
- So so much more – small things that add up to the big things

Why do all of this? Because we know what it feels like to go through the motions and we don’t want to do that.

P.S. We are loving our time at Carillon! So many fun things to try if you love health and wellness!

There is no fear in love...

1 John 4:18

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